Sunday, April 29, 2007

Sorrow and Phood Phreek

When life gets tough, the tough eat comfort food. And doesn't it figure that the week after you start a diet is when life gets tough!? I've had a bad year this past week and I'm sorely tempted to turn to some of my favorite comfort foods to help me at least feel a little better while I struggle through the next month...which might be another year long....

Some of my favorites are mac & cheese, cookies (only fresh homemade), rice with lemon juice and Greek seasoning slathered in butter, Ben & Jerry's New York Super Fudge Chunk, Lay's wavy potato chips (the entire bag) and sour cream (the entire pint), beef stroganoff with really yummy kluski noodles, oh, and sweet, buttery popcorn. Yup, right now I could probably finish off a big pot, plate, or mixing bowl of any of these. But so far I have managed to keep it down to one small piece of chocolate and a couple of cookies. The question is, how long can I hold out while life beats the crap out of me? I'm pretty sturdy. I can make it....I think....

There was a brunch this morning. I cooked. I wanted to. It's what I do best and with the most passion. Cooking keeps my mind busy when I don't want to think about anything else. I made a quiche of bacon and spinach with Emanthaller, roasted potatoes, and stewed fruit. It was good. I was surrounded by friends and tasty, warm food. Yesterday I found out one of my dogs has lung cancer and something just short of minutes to live. I brought her with me to the brunch. It was comforting having her near, if only for a few more days.

Why is it that when we are deep in sorrow we turn to food for comfort? How come a big bowl of mac & cheese or a fresh batch of cookies can make everything better....at least for a few minutes? Is it the warmth of the melted cheese? Or the sweet spice of the fresh cookies? Mostly I think it's that someone who cares about you and sees how much you are hurting makes or bakes something to let you know how much they love you in your deepest times of need. Stavra and I were talking about this just a few months ago. A friend of hers had a death in the family so she started baking for them. We were wondering why it is such a natural instinct for some of use to either hunger for or desire to provide comfort food. My guess would be that it's a basic survival need. We need food to live so when someone dies it's time to eat to help ensure our continued existence.

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I started this post in early March but have not been able to sit down to it again until just now. So, here I am. In sorrow for the loss of a pet, under a lot of stress from family member's severe illness and selling my house. How have I managed this? How have I ensured my continued existence? How have I persevered? Stavra's molasses cookies helped a lot. Spending time with close friends went a long way. Things are starting to look sunnier on the morning of my new life. Maybe one day, hopefully soon, I'll cook something again. I have a wedding cake project in my near future. I think I will have to post something on that soon. Carry on. Move along. Don't waste precious time be dragged in the depths of misery. Write something, cook something, eat something, live.

Oh, and the diet....PHAH...maybe next week.....

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